How not to write like a bot

It might seem self-serving and presumptuous to begin an article by quoting myself, but it seems appropriate in this context. 

Back in January 2023, I wrote the following in my article, Does ChatGPT mean brands will no longer have a unique voice?

"The more we rely on AI to produce texts for us, the more we'll see a flattening of human personality and diversity in written content. Brands will no longer have a unique voice because everyone will speak with the same artificial tone, and no one will stand out from the crowd."

It’s been almost a year since ChatGPT was put into the hands of consumers, and my prediction has certainly come true. Of course, I’m not claiming I’m some kind of Nostradamus. It was pretty obvious that this was where things were going. But now that we’re in this situation, what can we do about it? 

The solution to the problem isn’t just a matter of using AI detector tools or discouraging people from using LLMs as writing assistants (there’s nothing wrong with using them well and for the right things). The problem goes deeper than ChatGPT, and the use of generative AI for writing isn’t the only thing that makes for robotic-sounding content.

To do my part in the war against bot-like content, I’m going to present examples of typical overused writing conventions that make you sound like you used ChatGPT even if you didn’t. But before that, I need to say something about SEO.

The problem of SEO

Search engine optimization is a way of presenting online content in such a way that bots will understand its relevance and make it visible to people searching for words or concepts in that content when they look for it on Google, Bing, and other search engines.

It’s a reasonable endeavour, of course. The problem is when you write for bots, you end up sounding like one of them. I’m not saying that SEO should mean writing for bots (content should always be written for people), but I am saying that it usually does, unfortunately. 

So, if you recognize any of the conventions that I’m going to mention here, and you think, “But that’s not exclusive to AI-generated content”, you’re right. The problem is that ChatGPT uses them so much that people are now suspicious of what was once just done-to-death SEO copywriting. If you want to persist in writing that way, you may as well use ChatGPT till you’re blue in the face. But if you don’t want your writing to sound just like everything else online, keep reading.

Don’t begin with the blindingly obvious

Bots are terrible at beginning with something engaging. So are most copywriters (because SEO). The convention is you start with a keyword question, like, What is copywriting? And the first line in the paragraph begins with, ‘Copywriting is…’

It makes no difference whether you wrote it or used ChatGPT to write it. The result is the same: it’s boring! 

The reason for this convention is the belief that mentioning the keyword in the answer as soon as possible helps bots understand that your content is the answer to the question. I don’t want to get into SEO techniques here, so I won’t go into whether this really is good for SEO. But regardless, it makes your content sound like it was written for a school exam. 

Before you succumb to this quick and easy style of writing, do your best to think of something more imaginative. It could be an anecdote relevant to the topic, a quote, an interesting factoid, or an opinion. 

If you have to write in that Q&A style (because SEO), consider saving it for an FAQ section at the bottom of the article.

Those bloody numbered lists and bullet points!

ChatGPT is obsessed with listicles. So are marketers (because SEO). It is true that lists and bullet points don’t just help bots understand content; they’re helpful for people who want to skim, and most online content is written to be skimmable. But, once again, it’s boring! Or rather, it can be.

Even if you’re required (because SEO) to have a keyword question like, ‘What are the best writing techniques?’ followed by a list, it doesn’t mean the content has to be nothing but dry facts. You could try making the information in the list personal, funny, or - most importantly - helpful. Don’t just give bland dictionary definitions of everything. Sure, make your content skimmable, but don’t make it forgettable.

Avoid dull and unhelpful conclusions

If you’ve ever used ChatGPT to write content, I’m willing to bet you’ve had trouble getting it to finish up an article in any way other than this:

Conclusion

In conclusion, blah, blah, blah.

Again, this just makes your content sound like it was written for a school exam. 

If you’ve written a lengthy dissertation to prove an argument, then it makes sense to summarize your findings with a conclusion of the evidence. If you’ve written a tutorial, having a CTA or further reading makes sense so people aren’t left hanging without knowing the next step to take. But in most cases, if you need to tell the reader that they're reading a conclusion, that's just lazy writing.

First of all, don’t use the heading 'Conclusion'. For one, it’s of no SEO value, so if you can think of a heading that includes your keywords, it would be more helpful. But more importantly, it’s dull. Since ‘conclusion’ does nothing for SEO anyway, feel free to be creative.

Secondly, this is your last chance to make an impression. You could conclude by posing a question to make the reader think about what they’ve read (or maybe even read it again). Or you could summarize with (I can’t believe I’m about to write this) a list! Summarizing with a list of key points at least makes the gist easier to remember than a paraphrased paragraph.

Watch out for ChatGPT’s love of the gerund

This next one only occurs to me because of ChatGPT. I’ve noticed how much it uses the gerund (-ing) in certain contexts. Say you ask it to write about the benefits of SEO. It will (of course) give you a list, and often (though not always), it will sum up why the benefit is a benefit using the gerund. For example:

Increased Organic Traffic: SEO helps your website rank higher in search engine results pages (SERPs), leading to more organic (non-paid) traffic to your site.

If you use ChatGPT to help you write articles, watch out for that repetitive gerund. It gets tedious very quickly, and it will be obvious that it’s AI-generated content.

Avoid ‘As a x…’

ChatGPT sucks at writing something for a target audience. Ask it to imagine it’s a developer writing something for developers, for example, and all it will do is write like a marketer but begin with, “As a developer, you…”

Even if copywriters were using that trick pre-GPT to connect with the target audience, it’s so GPT-esque that it makes you sound like a bot. But more importantly, it’s dumb. Merely mentioning your target audience doesn’t amount to identifying with them. Try harder.

Avoid these words and phrases

Even though ChatGPT was trained on data from the web, it appears to have forgotten its training dataset and has developed a default style based on the majority of content written in marketinguese. As a result, there are some words and phrases that it overuses to the point where an attentive reader will recognize (or at least suspect) ChatGPT was the author.

Alas, this means that even if these words seem like good choices, you might want to think twice about using them. Try to find an equally good synonym instead.

• Leverage/leveraging (I'm so sick of this one that I've decided to boycott it from my personal lexicon)
• Seamless/seamlessly (pretty sick of this one, too)
• Robust (good word, but ChatGPT has ruined it through overuse. Try something like 'sturdy' instead).
• Unlock the power of x (this was buttock-clenchingly embarrassing even before ChatGPT)
• Demystifying x (and pretty much anything that begins with the prefixes de- or un-)
• Delve/dive into (enough already!)
• In today's x world... (this has never been a good introduction to anything)

Be careful of copy that’s too clean

ChatGPT isn’t the only culprit when it comes to this problem. Other tools that writers use (Hemingway, Grammarly, and others), while helpful, don’t always make good suggestions. 

If you’re an experienced writer, and if English is your first language (assuming you’re writing in English), you might feel confident enough to dismiss the suggestions of such tools. For the less experienced or those who don’t have English as a first language, it’s tempting to blindly accept everything those tools suggest. What you’ll end up with is perfect but boring English.

What kind of things am I talking about here? For one, Hemingway and Grammarly, by default, treat the use of passive like a cardinal sin. Then again, so do some humans who’ve gone too far with George Orwell’s fourth rule for writing, “Never use the passive where you can use the active”. But there are cases where the passive makes more sense or sounds much better. 

Another rule of Orwell's that has been taken too far is the second: “Never use a long word where a short one will do”. This can result in poor vocabulary, too much repetition, and words that just don’t capture the essence of what you want to say.

Of course, don’t use big words to show off, but use the right words at the right times. If a word that is more commonly known and easier to read is just as descriptive as one that isn’t, go for the easier one. But don’t sacrifice good vocabulary lightly.

Conclusion

In conclusion… Just kidding! 

Don’t rely on bots, and don’t write for them, either!

If you use a GPT model or writing tools like Grammarly and Hemingway to help you write content, take everything they suggest with a pinch of salt. They’re helpful, but if you blindly take them at their word, you’ll sound like a bot.

Whether or not you use AI for content, be cautious of typical done-to-death writing conventions (those of ChatGPT and those of SEO). If you must use them, at the very least, spruce them up a bit with interesting ideas, humour, opinions, or helpful insights. 

Finally, don’t be too hasty to relinquish research, creativity, ideas, or beautifully crafted sentences to bots. As a writer, that’s your job, not theirs!